The Great Race
by violaqu33n
Summary: Tsunade and Jiraiya are the two top competitors in the race to be elected Hokage in the Leaf Village. In a risky move, Tsunade sends two of her campaigners into Jiraiya's camp, the enemy territory. SasuSaku, ShikaTema, KibaIno.
1. The Mission

Disclaimer: Woo, baby! Feel that primary election rush! Good luck to all!

Sakura smiled and waved to the crowds of passing people, and handed posters to rushing businessmen and women hurrying from shop to shop, trying to avoid the thick snowflakes falling on expensively styled hair and tailored coats. It was truly December in Konoha.

Across the street, she spotted a tall man in a black woolen jacket shoving flyers indiscriminatingly into people's hands. She strained her ears to catch the words he was shouting, but couldn't make out anything intelligible.

A few minutes later, her smiling blonde friend broke through the crowds and handed her a batch of new papers.

"We just won the North Side!!" The two girls cheered madly, and Sakura pumped her fist in the air gleefully. Ino spun on the spot and stopped dead in her tracks. She clenched her gloved fists angrily.

"That slime! Peddle pushing for that dirtbag right in front of our nose!" Sakura scanned the crowds, and Ino pointed across the street to the man she had spotted only five minutes ago. Sakura looked confused.

"It's a guy handing out flyers. Big deal." Ino scowled and rolled her blue eyes with superiority, and patted Sakura's pink hair, like a mother talking to a particularly stupid child.

"That's _Sasuke Uchiha_. He's not just 'some guy passing out flyers', Forehead! He's Jiraiya's best supporter and he's gorgeous, so all the girls vote for whatever he's rooting for." Sakura's emerald eyes widened, then narrowed angrily.

"That bastard! He can't just make people vote for him, just because he's a pretty face!" Ino shrugged grudgingly, and mused Sakura's hair again.

"Don't worry Forehead, the cavalry's here." She smiled confidently, and pulled the posters from Sakura's numb hands, flipped her hair over her shoulder, and thrust the papers at the pedestrians, particularly the men, with a new vigor. They were snatched up like candy.

Sakura grinned with appreciation.

Across the street, Sasuke Uchiha narrowed his eyes as a slender blonde ran up to a rosette, and they cheered in victory. Sasuke did his homework. That was Ino Yamanaka, the best campaigner Tsunade had. Her pink friend was a close second.

His focus was broken when a hooded Kiba Inuzuka, his replacement, shuffled through the crowds. He grinned half heartedly.

"We won the Upper East Side!" His smiled dimmed even more. Sasuke waited impatiently for the oncoming bad news.

"And…?"

Kiba frowned and looked scathingly at the two girls across the street. "Tsunade crushed us in the North Side, all those girls coming out to vote." Sasuke shared his frown.

Kiba grabbed the few remaining flyers, brightly advertising voting for Jiraiya, and tossed them to the people trying to get home. He tugged Sasuke's sleeve impatiently.

"Come on. The boss wants all of us back. There's an announcement or something going on, and he wants all of us there."

Ino threw the remaining papers into the air, and grabbed Sakura's hand. "Come on, Forehead! Tsunade wants us back, like, now. She's got some assignment for you. I hope you don't mind a few cosmetic changes." Sakura opened her mouth to protest, but Ino grabbed her hand, and pulled her back to headquarters.

After the icy walk to Tsunade's office, the two girls burst in, panting and snow covered. The older blonde smiled at them both, and pointed to the two chairs in front of her desk. They sat down immediately.

Tsunade folded her manicured hands into front of her. "Sakura, I've got a new assignment for you." Sakura brightened. Anything was better than constantly handing out papers in the dead of winter.

"You'll be investigating the other team, a recon mission, to be blunt. Get involved and report back whatever you discover. Clear?" Sakura frowned.

"Isn't that cheating? That's revealing campaign secrets, and I don't think it's a very good…" Tsunade shot her a furious glare and banged her fist on the table. Both girls swallowed involuntarily.

"No, it's not, you think I wouldn't have checked these things before? It's called switching sides. Find something that you didn't know about that you don't believe in, and there you go, come right back to me. Besides, I'm not sending you. I'm sending in"-she checked the papers on her desk-"Mariko Tomioka. Understood?"

Sakura nodded. "Understood."

Tsunade smiled. "Excellent. Ino, go find the dye, and bring in the new girl." Ino nodded respectfully and tossed a bottle of black hair dye to Tsunade from her bag. Sakura's eyes widened.

"Oh no, not my hair, please, please? Can't you send anyone else?" Tsunade shook her head, and patted Sakura's hand sympathetically.

"It's not permanently. And at least you don't have to dress up as a boy or something ridiculous. Trust me, this'll be easy for you, Sakura." She gave her a hard look. "I'm sending you to do this, and not Ino, because I've got a lot of faith in you and your abilities. Don't let me down, understand?" Sakura nodded humbly.

Ino barged in, followed by a tall girl with four large blonde ponytails protruding from the back of her head. She nodded at Sakura, and bowed slightly to Tsunade.

"Sakura, this is Temari, from Suna. She's going to be your partner on this little adventure. Listen to what she tells you, she's had plenty of experience working on campaigns for her younger brother. I believe you know of Kazekage Gaara?" Sakura's mouth dropped open.

"That's your little brother?" Temari grinned and nodded, ponytails going insane at the sudden movement. Tsunade eyes her hair warily.

"Right, Sakura, take Ino and Temari and go dye your hair. And Temari, drop the ponytails. Ino, do you have any other colors in that bag of yours?" She nodded and pulled out an auburn, a dark black, and a mousy brown. Temari frowned.

Tsunade pointed to the auburn, and waved her hand to dismiss them. "No whining ladies. Come back and show me how you look when it's all done. You're dismissed."

Ino lead them into a small bathroom with two sinks and a shower. She held up the boxes of dye with a cheerfully smile.

"So who's first?"

About an hour later, a scowling girl with jet black hair, and an angry auburn prowled through the door of Tsunade's office. She burst out laughing.

"Oh very nice ladies. I think you're pretty golden. I do have another present for you girls." She pointed to the pair of contact case on her desk.

"They're color contact. Sakura's eyes stand out too much, and teal isn't very common. I don't want anyone tracing this little scene back to us. Remember, when you leave, make a _convincing_ reason. Understand? Something the press won't bother looking into. Got it?"

They nodded, and Temari popped in her lenses, reopened her eyes, and saw in Ino's hand mirror that her irises were now a twinkling dark jade. Sakura's eyes had been covered by a film of bright, icy blue, almost matching Ino.

Tsunade shooed them out. "Go on, go on. Go do your duty ladies!" They smiled and mock saluted, and walked out. Ino poked her head inside, bangs flopping over one eye.

"Think they'll be alright?" Tsunade shrugged and dropped her head into her hands.

"God I hope so, Ino. I really hope so."


	2. The Spies

Disclaimer: I decided to post chapter two immediately, because I really, really like were this is going. To clarify, there are five major districts that Tsunade and Jiraiya are campaigning for: Upper East Side, Lower East Side, North Side, South Side, and the West Side.

The small bell hanging over the door tinkled as Sasuke walked in, lips chapped from the cold. Inside the bustling office, workers, almost entirely made up of teenage boys, hustled back and forth, spilling coffee, dropping doughnuts, and basically trying to create the greatest campaign of the century.

It was pretty hilarious.

At least, it _would_ have been pretty hilarious, if Sasuke Uchiha had any sense of humor to speak of. He smirked a few times when Naruto tripped repeatedly on his own two feet, knocking over a scurrying, scrawny adolescent, sporting bad acne, and carrying a huge stack of files. Papers went everywhere.

Jiraiya banged his lined, massive fist on the table, and the phone, books, and stapler all jumped. "Watch where the hell you're going Naruto, I swear, I'll kill you the next time this happens." He turned towards Sasuke taking off his scarf and winding it around the coat rack.

"Uchiha! Get over here before my mind explodes from talking to these idiots!" Sasuke nodded semi-obediently and strolled over, casually stepping on the very center of Naruto's stomach. The blonde boy squeaked on the ground.

Jiraiya thrust a sheet of paper under his nose, detailing campaigning plans, and more importantly, the new slogan for the tons of posters being distributed. Sasuke scowled at the picture. _He_ was not going to become the new poster child for Jiraiya's campaign. He glared at the older man pointedly, who sighed in return.

"Sasuke, you've got to see the bigger picture! All these women crawling at your feet, hoping you would just strip down for only a few moments!" Sasuke shuddered at this mental image, but Jiraiya plowed forwards. "Can you even imagine the power we could harness to take this campaign to the next level?! Granny Tsunade would be down for good, and there'd be nothing stopping us."

Sasuke rolled his onyx eyes and shrugged noncommittally. "I'll think about it. But it's a horrible idea. The girls all voted for the old lady in the North Side, and she completely obliterated us. We need to focus more on the issues, not my abs! And girls don't even _do _that much for this campaign! We've got, what three girls working here?"

As Sasuke finished his annoyingly long winding speech, the bell tinkled against, and a petite, black haired girl stepped in shyly, followed by a taller woman with elegant auburn hair twisted into a pair of low pigtails. The men stopped running around the crowed office and gawked openly.

Naruto stepped up to the plate. "Hello, sweetheart. You lost, baby?" The two girls exchanged glances.

The slap of the auburn girl's hand echoed throughout the stunned office. He stumbled back a few feet and rubbed the side of his face with tenderness and obvious fury.

"You crazy, bitchy, little, WHO-mmph!!!" Sasuke slapped a firm hand over Naruto's mouth, barely in time. That girl was obviously insane. The black haired girl smirked and turned a laugh into a fit of coughing.

Jiraiya glided forward, smiling soothingly, giving a glare to Naruto, an approving nod to Sasuke, and a quick once over of both girls. He nodded subtly. Sasuke rolled his eyes.

"Ladies, welcome, welcome, welcome, to my office. What can I do for you today? It seems rather unwise for me to not tend to your concerns personally." The shorter girl raised her eyebrows and extended a hand, fingernails painted in a chipped smoky grey.

"I'm Mariko, and this is, uh, um, Ai. I'm sorry about, um, your worker. My friend can be a bit"- and Ai cut her off angrily.

"Self respecting? Terribly sorry I don't let dickless little boys try to act five times their age. I think cutting down the male ego early is the best path to success. But hey, that's just me." There was a snicker at the back of the room, and Naruto turned angrily to go barrage the laughing observer.

"Anyways." Mariko rushed on. "We just moved into town, and we heard all about your campaign, and we really, really wanted to join, and I think we could give you the view from the girl point of view. It seems to be a bit, uh, _lacking_." Jiraiya nodded sagely, stroking his chin in a way that seemed thoughtful, but he was really just looking down her shirt.

Alright, who didn't see that coming?

Ai stepped forward, smiling falsely. "Why don't you have us work with your advertisers and tacticians, alright? And we'll see what we can come up with." With her sweater showing only the faintest hint of cleavage, Jiraiya's perverted smile dimmed considerably. He nodded thoughtfully in agreement.

"Fine. Ladies, this is my best advertiser, and one of the best in the business, Sasuke Uchiha. Sasuke here helps plan the campaign to get lovely girls such as yourselves to vote for us. So how wants to work with him, and who wants to meet the tactician?"

The girls exchanged a quick glance, and Mariko smiled sweetly. "Can you give us a minute to discuss your offer?" She batted her lashes delicately, and Jiraiya felt a quick hot flash.

"Sure thing girls, take your time." Ai smiled, a little too sickly, and pulled Mariko aside. She slapped the younger girl hard on the arm, and she yelped quietly and rubbed her forearm, while Ai began barraging her in an angry whisper.

"Sakura, stop acting so sweet towards them! We're here to get the job done, not to flirt with a pervy old man. So you work with the poster boy, and I'll try to lead on the tactician. Just try to mess with the Uchiha, ok?" She paused for a moment. "On second thought, flirt with him. Flirt with all of them, make them all distracted. I'm not so good at picking up guys."

Sakura repressed a giggle, and nodded, switching back into Mariko-mode. Together, they turned back to Jiraiya with a smile. Mariko walked over to Sasuke, and took a seat in the chair closest to him, propping her elbows up, and leaning forward playfully.

"So you're Sasuke, right? It's great to meet you in person, I've just heard _so much_ about how you gave so much to the campaign, and I think it's really gr-"- He covered her mouth forcefully, and she gazed at him with a pouty, hurt expression.

"Stop being so annoying and start doing your job. I'm not here to flirt with you." Sakura scowled slightly, and started scribbling possible slogans. It was going to be a long two months.

Meanwhile, one of the other assistants was guiding Temari gingerly through the maze of male bodies towards the tactician. She tapped her foot impatiently as the assistant tried to shift a slumped body towards the wall, until her thin patience snapped.

"Oh _move_, I'll do it!" With an angry grunt, she grabbed the man by the scruff of his neck, and half dragged, half threw him against the wall, and smacked her hands together satisfactorily. The assistant, and half the men in the office looked completely stunned. She tried to smile demurely at them.

A lazy voice startles her. "Cover your balls now lads, this one's a fighter." Ai clenched her fists and spun around, ready to break a few noses.

The assistant's face broke into a relived smile. "Ai, this is our best tactician, Nara Shikamaru." She snorted heavily, and strode up to him, until she was only a few inches away. He raised a dark eyebrow, and she stabbed him in the chest viciously with her finger.

"You better cover your little-boy balls damn good, you stupid"-she gave him a quick once over-"You stupid pineapple head!"


End file.
